A ‘last night of freedom’ with your best friends and a whole lot of fun and frivolity is guaranteed; right? Oh… if only it was that simple. Sadly, many brides’ hens dos turn out to be a major let down. The bride-to-be ends up wanting to forget it ever happened rather than remembering it as the special event that her bridesmaids had certainly intended it to be. Even the best meant plans can go sadly awry once you are all together and hit the town. That’s why we’ve put together our tips on how to have a successful hen party and make sure it is is remembered for all the right, delectable reasons.
Rule 1: Do NOT Forget The Bride
It may sound totally obvious to NOT forget the bride, but believe it or not it happenson a regular basis. Why? …because it’s human nature to imagine that others want, feel, and desire the same things you do. It’s human nature to get so enthusiastic about an idea that you just can’t imagine that others, in this case the bride to be, couldn’t be just as enthusiastic about it as you.
Ever heard the saying: “Opposites attract”? Could it be possible that your best friend for whom you are planning to organise this phenomenal hens party feels, thinks and wants just the opposite to you? Are you possibly an extrovert whereas she tends to be more of an introvert? Are you comfortable being the centre of attention whereas she cringes at the very idea of it? Do you have two left feet, whereas she, the hen, loves to dance? Could you possibly not imagine anything better in the universe than a lap dance, whereas she the hen would prefer to spend a weekend in Hell rather than undergo such an ordeal?
In a nutshell, as organising the hen’s party is usually on the list of responsibilities belonging to the chief bridesmaid, it can be easy to get carried away and organise the kind of hens night you want rather than the kind of hens do the bride wants. You don’t have to let on about what’s going to happen on that very special day for her, but you MUST ask her what she wants and doesn’t want. That way you can pull together an event you know that she who is meant to be the star of the show will enjoy. You and the other guests will love the fact that she’s having a ball , so keep in mind it’s all about the hen and everyone else is secondary.
Do NOT forget:
You want to see your hen smiling, giggling and rejoicing all day and night. So remember, do NOT surprise or rather shock your hen with something she does not want.
Rule 2: Choosing the Best Organiser
If the chief bridesmaid is known for NOT being big on responsibility but rather is known for being a bit of an air head it would be a mistake to let her organise such a special event.
No bride would want her hen’s night to become a shambles simply due to her best friend’s INability to organise it. However the hen may feel uncomfortable telling that very best friend that she shouldn’t take on the task of organising the hen’s day. This is when diplomacy or possibly weaseling is an absolute necessity.
Perhaps the bride could sort out her own hen’s do; an evening online together should be all it takes to bring together the bones of the event and work out the costing. Why not get an airhead chief matron of honour to do the inviting-she may be less phased about not inviting the people the hen doesn’t necessarily want to have come to the party but may feel obliged to invite.
The job of organising the logistics of the hen’s event can then be allotted to someone with a knack for organising things.
But what to do if the hen isn’t aware of the foibles of her beloved chief bridesmaid? And you who are an A1 responsible organiser realise this with dismay and feel that every hair on your body stand on end at the very thought of letting that rash, capricious, albeit charming individual take the helm? We recommend weaseling: take on the task and usurp her role by use of cunning and stealth ;-). That will guarantee a successful hen’s party, and after all that what it’s all about.
Rule 3: Give Plenty of Advance Warning
The sooner you set the date for the hen’s night and start inviting people the better. Some people like to send out ‘save the date’ notes.
Why should you announce the party as early as possible? The reason for this is that people may have to book time off work, organise babysitters, book flights or save up for the event itself. The further in advance you announce a hen’s night the more chance you have of having almost everyone being able to attend. Nothing turns a much anticipated hen’s night into a damp squib as having only 9/30 invited guests turn up.
If you have been given the honourable role of organising the hen’s party and inviting all the guests, be sure to follow-up repeatedly. Send out several notices. You could start with a snail mail card (this always makes a good impression and creates an emotional target is nowadays the only thing we seem to receive by snail mail is advertising and bills ;-)).
Then Follow-up with several emails and after that tackle the guests with calls and sms’s.
Be PERSISTENT and be INSISTENT.
Remind any reticent guest that this is about her friend. Point out that her friend, the hen, wants her to come along to her hen’s party. Sweetly tell that reticent guest that if she doesn’t come, the party just won’t be the same. Explain that the hen would take her nonappearance to heart. Don’t hesitate to lay it all out there when striving to achieve your goal… which is to ensure that a maximum number of friends come and celebrate this special night with their friend the hen.
If you suspect that there may be some underlying emotional reasons why this particular friend doesn’t want to come, address them discretely and kindly. If you think she is shy or timid or perhaps fearful because she won’t know anybody at the party, ensure her that the party will start with an ice breaker. Explain to her that this icebreaker (see below) will enable those guests who don’t know anyone else to become acquainted with the hen’s other friends and that in turn will make her feel at ease and have her enjoy herself.
Rule 4: Create Ice Breakers
You will invariably have a wide range of guests to invite to the hens do. The bride’s family, personal friends, work friends, those who are part of her team if the bride takes part in any sporting activity… the list is endless. This also gives to the fact that not everyone will know everyone else and the last thing you want is a fragmented hen’s party with everyone sticking with their own little group and not mingling.
The answer to this sticky problem? Book a hen’s party package to get the party started that is guaranteed to break the ice. This can be as naughty or as nice as you like, from life drawing with a very fit male model,
to rude origami,
to a Burlesque event.
Thanks to any of these packages, by the end of the activity everyone will be acquainted and feel relaxed with everyone else and a great night will be had by all.
A shared activity that is fun and uplifting causes people within a group to feel connected, bond and feel at ease with each other. This is a ground rule for organising a successful party that will be enjoyed and remembered by the hen and her friends.
Rule 5: Determine the Budget as Early as Possible and Stick To It
A night out is expensive enough, as is a costume- themed party, but when other factors come into it such as travel, club entry, chipping in for visits or party packages the costs soon mount.
It is the responsibility of the organiser to ensure the price she quotes for the hen’s party is the final price. There is nothing worse than turning up on the day with only enough to pay for your night to discover that there is a hidden charge the organiser ‘forgot’ to tell you about. This is not only upsetting but downright unacceptable. It gets the event off to a lousy start and those feelings can escalate through the night as the drinks start to flow and the tongues get looser.